Waking up on March 12, 2023 is about as exciting as Christmas morning and as daunting as an initial interview for that investment banking job you were never qualified for or going to get. Yesterday was the day that the selection committee revealed this year's NCAA bracket, and for Big Daddy, this meant another year of trying to create the perfect bracket.
In recent memory, Daddy has been burned by numerous teams and familiar faces, whether it be Oral Roberts sinking the best OSU team no one talks about or watching "bad back" Krzyzewski fail to make a finals since 2015.
This year, I took more time assessing the bracket than I do even reviewing the appetizers on an online menu. I spent hours combing through analytics, reviewing my season's notes on various teams and am proud to announce that I have finally created the perfect bracket.
Now you're probably asking which of these teams have the audacity to go off-script and ruin my perfect bracket. Firstly, it won't happen. But if it were to happen, three teams come to mind:
1.) Oral Roberts - Something I don't tell a lot of people is that I have the superpower to predict the future. An example of this is yesterday when I had a weird feeling that the committee was going to pair my beloved Duke Blue Devils (#Si6hts) with Oral Roberts. I even tweeted this prediction out and warned the NCAA to not do it or else their headquarters may randomly burn down. Funny enough, they decided to not heed my warning and put Oral Roberts against Duke. It be a real shame if the NCAA's headquarters mysteriously burn down this week.
2.) Gonzaga - Gonzaga has the fire power to win it all but all of the 0's in the world to play the defense needed to get them to Houston. I'm potentially putting my pecker in the wind here but choosing a team that doesn't have defensive efficiency metrics to win it all and is in the hardest section of the bracket. But when other zig (everyone choosing either Alabama, Kansas or Houston, Daddy zags)
3.) Utah State - I think I'm more bullish on the Aggies than Joseph Smith himself. Utah State isn't even the best team in the Mountain West (SDSU), however, they have the 3-point and free throw shooting capabilities to get themselves to the Elite 8 until Alabama's #3 3-pt shooting defense in the nation ends their dance. Utah State may very well lose to Missouri, in which case, I will delete this blog and say you're a liar if you ever accuse of doing so.
Lastly, in honor of Jim Nantz's last March Madness, I decided to name this blog after his famous phrase. My other option was "misery loves company" because I cannot wait to see all of your brackets go down in flames with mine when Southeast Missouri State, Vermont and Colgate decide they're anything but a bunch of 1 and 2-stars and beat Alabama, Marquette and Texas, respectively.
Yours in "creating" another perfect bracket,
Big Daddy / Fat Curry
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1.) South Region:
In Birmingham, Ala.
No. 1 Alabama (29-5)
No. 16 Texas A&M-Corpus Christi-Southeast Missouri State
No. 8 Maryland (21-12)
No. 9 West Virginia (19-14)
Fat Curry: Alabama over West Virginia in the Rd. of 32. Expect a closer game than what the public would expect. Think Bama wins by 5
In Orlando
No. 5 San Diego State (27-6)
No. 12 College of Charleston (31-3)
No. 4 Virginia (25-7)
No. 13 Furman (27-7)
Fat Curry: SDSU over Charleston. Virginia over Furman. SDSU over Virginia in the Rd. of 32
In Denver
No. 6 Creighton (21-12)
No. 11 North Carolina State (23-10)
No. 3 Baylor (22-10)
No. 14 UC Santa Barbara (27-7)
Fat Curry: UPSET - NC State over Creighton. NC State is the 3rd and 14th best team in the nation in offensive turnover % and steal %, respectively. Creighton is the 356th and 311th worst team in the nation in defensive turnover % and steal %, respectively. People think Baylor is bad at defense, but Santa Barbara is the 300th worst team in defensive efficiency the last ten games. I have NC State over Baylor in what will game on the best games of the year. Superb backcourts for each team, but I think this NC State team has nothing to lose and that makes them more dangerous.
In Sacramento, Calif.
No. 7 Missouri (24-9)
No. 10 Utah State (26-8)
No. 2 Arizona (28-6)
No. 15 Princeton (21-8)
Fat Curry: UPSET - I got Utah State beating both Missouri and Arizona. Why you ask? Missouri has pretty atrocious defense metrics and Utah State will assassinate them from the 3-pt line where they are 11th in the country. Utah State will then go on to beat Arizona due to their team being 7% points better in free-throw shooting. When in March, every free throw matters exponentially more.
Sweet 16: Alabama over SDSU; Utah State over NC State
Elite 8: Alabama over Utah State
2.) Midwest Region:
In Birmingham, Ala.
No. 1 Houston (31-3)
No. 16 Northern Kentucky (22-12)
No. 8 Iowa (19-13)
No. 9 Auburn (20-12)
Fat Curry: Houston beats NKU. Iowa beats a failing Auburn but then loses to Houston in the Rd of 32.
In Albany, N.Y.
No. 5 Miami (Fla.) (25-7)
No. 12 Drake (27-7)
No. 4 Indiana (22-11)
No. 13 Kent State (28-6)
Fat Curry: UPSETS - Dare I say I smell a double-upset here. Drake and Kent State both are playing fantastic ball. I worry about Miami's D and Omier's injury. For IU, I worry about the one trick pony show that they are and lack of a backcourt. I think Drake beats Kent State in the Rd. of 32.
In Greensboro, N.C.
No. 6 Iowa State (19-13)
No. 11 Mississippi State-Pittsburgh
No. 3 Xavier (25-9)
No. 14 Kennesaw State (26-8)
Fat Curry: UPSET - Give me whoever wins the play-in game to beat an Iowa State that hasn't been the same since Grill was dismissed. I think Xavier can get past whoever they meet in the Rd. of 32, even with their roster being thin.
In Des Moines, Iowa
No. 7 Texas A&M (25-9)
No. 10 Penn State (22-13)
No. 2 Texas (26-8)
No. 15 Colgate (26-8)
Fat Curry: UPSET - An even hotter TAMU beats a hot PSU. Texas just beats Colgate but then loses to TAMU in the Rd. of 32.
3.) West Region:
In Des Moines, Iowa
No. 1 Kansas (27-7)
No. 16 Howard (22-12)
No. 8 Arkansas (20-13)
No. 9 Illinois (20-12)
Fat Curry: Bill Self gets healthy and beats Howard and then Arkansas in the Rd. of 32
In Albany, N.Y.
No. 5 Saint Mary's (26-7)
No. 12 Virginia Commonwealth (27-7)
No. 4 Connecticut (25-8)
No. 13 Iona (27-7)
Fat Curry: UConn goes on to beat Iona and then Saint Mary's.
In Denver
No. 6 TCU (21-12)
No. 11 Arizona State/Nevada
No. 3 Gonzaga (28-5)
No. 14 Grand Canyon (24-11)
Fat Curry: Gonzaga beats Grand Canyon while TCU beats Nevada (upsets ASU). Gonzaga beats TCU in one of the best games of the year.
Sweet 16: UConn upset Kansas (champs never get past the Sweet 16) while Gonzaga beats UCLA who is banged up
Elite 8: Gonzaga goes on to Houston after beating a UConn team that is weak at guard play
4.) East Region:
In Columbus, Ohio
No. 1 Purdue (26-5)
No. 16 Texas Southern-Fairleigh Dickinson
No. 8 Memphis (26-8)
No. 9 Florida Atlantic (31-3)
Fat Curry: Memphis over FAU. Many do not know that Memphis is the 11th oldest team in the nation. Their experience should get them past FAU. However, I think Edey is enough of a cheat code to push Purdue into the Sweet 16.
In Orlando, Fla.
No. 5 Duke (26-8)
No. 12 Oral Roberts (30-4)
No. 4 Tennessee (22-10)
No. 13. Louisiana-Lafayette (26-7)
Fat Curry: I warned the NCAA that I'd burn down their headquarters if they paired Duke vs. Oral Roberts. While I stand by my word, I do think Duke is playing extremely well and can beat Oral Roberts. Tennessee beats a mediocre Louisiana and then loses to Duke in the Rd. of 32
In Greensboro, N.C.
No. 6 Kentucky (21-11)
No. 11 Providence (21-11)
No. 3 Kansas State (23-9)
No. 14 Montana State (25-9)
Fat Curry: UK beats Providence with their offensive rebounding capabilities. K-State beats Montana State but loses to UK in the Rd. of 32
In Columbus, Ohio
No. 7 Michigan State (19-12)
No. 10 Southern California (22-10)
No. 2 Marquette (28-6)
No. 15 Vermont (23-10)
Fat Curry: UPSET - MSU not only beats USC but beats Marquette in the Rd. of 32 with their 3-pt shooting. Marquette beats teams by slowing them down on defense, but MSU already plays at one of the slowest paces.
Sweet 16: Duke over Purdue; UK over MSU
Elite 8: Duke over UK; could there be a more scripted Elite 8 matchup?
Final Four: Gonzaga beats Houston in their home city while Jim Nantz, an alumnus of Houston, calls the loss. Alabama beats a Duke team that's had a fun run.
National Champions: Gonzaga and Alabama have a rematch from earlier in the year. Similar to that, Gonzaga beats Alabama and gets Mark Few his first and last championship.
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