You Da Bell of The Ball (Week 13 Locks)

Boys and Girls, Gentiles and Jews, Bridge Builders and James Franklins,

I hope all of you are recovering from excess amounts of tryptophan in your bloodstream. I'm proud to announce that we made it to Week 13, also known as Da Bell of The Ball week or annual OSU beats Michigan day. While you were struggling to shake off Wednesday night's hangover from overindulging in fireball shots because you were too afraid to make eye contact at the local bar with boys and girls that you used to practice speaking in tongues with, Daddy was pulling all nighters for his 3 weekly viewers to make sure he finds locks of the year scattered in today's slate.

I sit here in my parent's family room wearing a stolen Marriott robe, holding a Cutco knife that my parents naively bought from one of my friends back in high school and am ready to commit the act of Seppuku if my locks of the year below don't hit. I'm not a fraud like James Franklin, Stanford Steve or Andy Beshear. I actually stand by my words and am willing to put my life on the line for your bank accounts if I don't deliver on my promises. I leave you below with what may be my final words. If they are, my dying wish is that you pry the tub of land o lakes butter from my cold fat fingers, rub a handful on yourself like an Egyptian Pharaoh getting embalmed and sweat out the greatest day in college football.

Yours in not giving a damn about the whole state of michigan,

Big Daddy / Fat Curry / Pharaoh Curry

Week 13 CFB Predictions: Fat Curry vs. His Life

Fat Curry Week 12 Record: 7-7; -0.64 units

Cumulative Fat Curry Record: 44-55-1; -28.47 units

Cumulative "The Public" Record: 33-32-1; 18.44 units

Fat Curry:

Lock of the Year ("LOW"): West Virginia @ Oklahoma State; WVU +7.5 (-115), 7 units (Won)

Dog of the Week ("DOW"): Minnesota @ Wisconsin; Minnesota +3.5 (-115), 1 unit; Minnesota ML (+145), 1 unit (Won)

Lookahead Letdown Lock of the Week ("Triple L"): Indiana vs. Purdue; Indiana ML (+325), 1/3 unit (Loss)

Regular Game #1: Georgia vs. Georgia Tech; Georgia -35.5 (-115), 1 unit (Loss)

Regular Game #2: OSU vs. the team up north; OSU -6.5 (-135), 2 units (Loss)

Regular Game #3: ECU @ Temple; ECU -9.5 (-115), 1 unit (Loss)

Regular Game #4: Northern Illinois vs. Akron; NIU -9.5 (-115), 1 unit (Loss)

Regular Game #5: Illinois @ Northwester; Under 37.5 (-115), 1 unit (Loss)

Regular Game #6: Oregon State vs. Oregon; Oregon State +2.5 (-115), 1 unit (Won)

Regular Game #7: Memphis @ SMU; Memphis +4.5 (-115), 1 unit; Over 69.5 (-115), 1 unit (Won), (Loss)

Regular Game #8: Alabama vs. Auburn; Alabama -22.5 (-115), 1 unit; Over 50.5 (-115), 1 unit (Loss), (Won)

Regular Game #9: Iowa State @ TCU; Iowa State +10.5 (-115), 1 unit (Loss)

Regular Game #10: Utah @ Colorado; Under 52.5 (-115), 1 unit (Loss)

Regular Game #11: Penn State vs. Michigan State; PSU -17.5 (-125), 1 unit (Won)

Regular Game #12: South Florida vs UCF; South Florida +19.5 (-115), 1 unit (Won)

Regular Game #13: LSU @ TAMU; LSU -9.5 (-115), 1 unit (Loss)

Regular Game #14: Vandy vs. Rocky Top; Vandy +15.5 (-125), 1 unit (Loss)

Regular Game #15: Syracuse @ Boston College; Syracuse -10.5 (-110), 1 unit (Loss)

Regular Game #16: UNLV vs. Nevada; UNLV -12.5 (-115), 1 unit (Loss)

Regular Game #17: Washington State vs. Washington; The Fighting Cam Wards +1.5 (-115), 1 unit (Loss)

Regular Game #17: Pitt @ Miami-U; Pitt -6.5 (-115), 1 unit (Won)

Fat Curry Week 13 Record: 9-15; -4.13 units

Cumulative Fat Curry Record: 53-70-1; -32.60 units

Cumulative "The Public" Record: 33-32-1; 18.44 units